The last time I published a post here, I was excited about holiday plans, social events, and the anticipation of a big holiday "spread" that would undoubtedly spread my waistline with the ease of butter.
But, I've never really been a calorie counting-salad eating-diet Coke drinking chick.
Why start now? I was on cloud nine, "as visions of sugar plums danced in my head."
Then it all changed. In 72 hours.
I got a call from my mom that my brother died unexpectedly.
I can't begin to tell you how that rocked my world. How it changed my perspective.
As is human nature, I immediately began to reminisce. I thought of all the good times.
I remembered all the plans that Pete and I "tentatively" had, but never quite found the time to get around to.
He loved my cooking! We were supposed to get together at his new place soon, where I would whip up some comfort food and share some laughs. Also on the list was a plan to attend local real estate seminars (of which we both shared an interest). But, I got busy. And so did he.
I'm sure you can probably relate. In these fast-paced, hectic, demanding times, we find ourselves trying to fit more in than can reasonably be accommodated; particularly if we factor in restful sleep and self-care. But, take it from me, we must make time for family, friends and loved ones.
If I could do things over again, I would do it differently.
Unfortunately, real life doesn't provide a "rewind" button. Bummer.
So, the moral of the story here?
Be less busy. Make sure that your activities and routines reflect your values.
Spend less time on Facebook and more on cultivating real conversations that create real bonds and future memories.
Put your cell phones down at the dinner table.
Cherish each day. Tomorrow is not promised.
And tell those near and dear to you that you love them. While you can.
I love you Peter...Rest in peace.
Personally you and I have never met but I can relate to what has happened to you and with that my heart goes out. It is easy to think we have time. We'll do it next week. We'll do it next month. See you next year. It is part of our make-up so please, do not allow yourself to be consumed with guilt. He would have felt the same had it been you. As time passes think of the good times. His smile, the sound of his laugh and the crazy things he shouldn't have done. Laugh instead of cry and when you do I'll bet you'll hear his laughter too.
ReplyDeleteGod bless.
Dear Bryan,
DeleteI am not sure how you found me and my blog, but I am so glad you did.
Your comments are always so thoughtful, responsive and kind.
This one made me both smile and cry.
It also speaks to the power of blogging and why I grew to love it.
I have to be honest, I cannot remember how I found your blog. But I'm glad I did.
DeleteSmiles. :)
Thanks, Bryan for your time, readership and support.
ReplyDeleteJen,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss. Whether time flies or drags, we never seem to make the time. I'm sure you and Pete made wonderful memories. Rely on those to get you through. My heart goes out to you.
Lin,
ReplyDeleteThanks so much dear. Dealing with it the best I can. Day to day.
Jen--I am so sorry that you lost your brother. As a writer, you have the ability to keep the memory of your brother alive--by writing about him.
ReplyDeleteLife is fleeting, and so many of the things we worry about are not important at all.
Take care of your mother. Parents are not supposed to bury their children. My condolences...
Sioux,
ReplyDeleteSo glad to hear from you today. Thanks so much for taking the time to offer up your support and sympathy. Wise advice here. I'm
Sending hugs and virtual chocolate across the miles.
Thanks again.
You have my complete sympathy and empathy, Jen. I've lost two of my three of my brothers. You are so right about slowing down. I do it. I get it. God bless you and your family.
ReplyDeleteSue,
ReplyDeleteI didn't know that. So sorry to hear this. I admire your strength.
Thanks so much for your comment and your lovely card.
You are a blessing to many, my friend.
You and your family have my deepest sympathies. You are so right, we are not promised tomorrow. We need to take advantage of each day we're blessed with. My younger sister passed away unexpectedly 7 years ago. I'd spoken to her a little over 24 hours before her passing, so that truth hit home in a big way. You all continue in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteKaren,
DeleteThanks for sharing this. I remember when it happened. If there is anything positive I can take away from all this is the consolation that I am not alone in my sorrow.
My heart is warmed by the cards, calls and outpouring of support from friends near and far. I am deeply grateful and fortunate.
Jennifer: I am sorry for your loss. One thing some local friends and I have learned is that we should take *nothing* for granted.
ReplyDeleteYou are right when you say, we must take time to do things with our families and our loved ones and also not to forget ourselves.
Celeste,
DeleteI sincerely appreciate your thoughts and kindness. Be well.